Sunday, January 08, 2006

microbiology hell

I've survived my first week of training in urines, and I have to say I'm completely and totally overwhelmed. Half of the department has told me this is completely normal--because of the volume of urines, it'll be weeks until I can totally do the bench myself. I have one more week of training before spending a week by myself, and I'm already anticipating I'll be staying until 1700 every night to get the fucking things finished. Everyone is so helpful--they'll grab a stack of negatives to help finish the work--but somehow that makes me feel even more incompetent. Today I made flow charts to help myself. I have a tendancy to cry when I feel overwhelmed, so I hope I don't cry at work. That would seriously wreck my image.

Friday I recieved a rejection for a story I sent out over a year ago. It's your basic form letter--thank you for sending but we are unable to accept your submission, blah blah blah--but one of the editors took the time to hand write a comment on the bottom: "Several of the editors enjoyed "Cleaning Day." Unfortunately, however, it didn't make the final cut. Best of luck with it." Only in a creative field--writing, acting, design, art--would a rejection with the comment "we liked it" make one happy. I can't shake the feeling I'm close to breaking through ... only a few more years, maybe, until people can buy one of my books at the bookstore. Wishful thinking, perhaps, but most days that's what keeps me going.