The reliable realist

Answers to your burning questions

1. Have you ever killed a man?
Um, no. Why do you ask?

2. With your own hands?
If I were to kill someone--and this is purely hypothetical here--I would use biological means. A little botulism toxin goes a long way, you know.

3. What, in your opinion, is the best way to transport contraband across state and country lines?
I would never transport contraband. But if I did, I'd have to say "Pay a mule to do it." Why get your own hands dirty? Wasn't I plain enough about how I feel about that in question 2?

4. Even if you're transporting explosives?
Yep.

5. Really?
Yes, really. Sheesh, people.

6. Have you ever stolen a library book?
No.

7. On purpose, or only because you found it under your bed years after you reported it lost and paid the fine?
Neither. I'm as clean as a preacher's sheets on this one.

8. Where were you on November 1, 2007?
Uh ... probably at work. Or at home. Possibly both, but not at the same time.

9. Can you prove it?
No. Dear God, now that I think about it, I may have been out of the country.

10. You had to think about that, didn't you?
Yeah. That's actually kind of a scary question when you really think about it. What if you really did need to prove what you did on a past date?

11. How much is it worth to you for me to pretend I didn't notice?
Not much, actually. I'm not easily embarrassed.

12. Have you spent years building up an immunity to iocane powder? (And if you know a faster method, will you share it?)
As a matter of fact, I do know a better way, but it involves a land war in Asia. You don't want to hear about it.

13. Name three different ways to start a fire.
Um ... hmmmm. A match. Dropping a chunk of pure sodium in a bucket of water might work to get some sparks going. Flint and steel.

14. Now try to convince me you only know that because you were a Girl/Boy Scout/Guide once.
I'm not even going to try. Anyone who knows me knows I'm no girl scout.

15. How many digits of pi can you recite from memory?
3.14 .... so, the first three.

16. Did you have to count out the digits on your fingers to answer that?
No.

17. Did you check online to make sure you remembered right before answering?
No.

18. Does all this talk about numbers make you uncomfortable?
Oddly, yes.

19. Or are you just wondering what it has to do with the rest of the meme?
Well, that, too.

20. Seriously, where did you bury the body?
Dude, I'm not telling you.

21. Where were you on March 16, 2036?
I'm definitely not answering that.

22. If all your friends jumped off a bridge, would you jump, too?
Hell, no. I'm probably the one that pushed them.

23. What is the ninja replacement score for your life?
Oh, jeez. At least three.

Time for you to shout out, peeps.

Time for a little meme cribbage:

I know very little about some of the people that read my blog. Some people I know relatively well. (Some I know too well. You know who you are.) I read your journals, or we have something else in common and we chat occasionally. Some of you I hardly know at all. Perhaps you lurk, for whatever reason. But you visit and I thank you for your interest in my words.But here's a thought: why not take this opportunity to tell me a little something about yourself. Any old thing at all. Just so the next time I see your name I can say: "Ah, there's so and so...they listen in rapture to the love-music of she-turnips." I might feel compelled to mock your musical taste, but I'll certainly remember you.I'd love it if every single person who reads would do this. Yes, even you people who I know really well. Then post this in your own journal and see what gems of knowledge appear.

Da answers!

Here's the answers to the song meme:

1. All the Wrong Reasons, Nickleback
2. Lose Yourself, Eminem
3. Theme for Young Lovers, Ocean's Eleven soundtrack
4. Boulevard of Broken Dreams, Green Day
5. Forgiven, Alanis Morrisette
6. Bad Medicine, Bon Jovi
7. You Took the Words, Meat Loaf
8. Son of a Preacher Man, Dusty Springfield
9. Three's Company theme song
10. Take Your Mama, Scissor Sisters

Thanks to all who played!

Another time-waster for your amusement

All right, fine. I give in. Here's a meme I cribbed from Elizabeth Glover. For those of you who read my blogspot and LJ blogs, forgive me; I'm posting this to both.

Set your music player to "shuffle." Take a random lyric from each of the first ten songs to play. The blog readers that guess correctly get a Great Prize!
P.S. Googling the lyric=cheating.
P.P.S. The Great Prize=the satisfaction of being correct. You're gettin' nothin' from me.

As an extra bonus, I'm including a few hints. I think this is hard.

1. You got off every time you got on to me. (Think recent rock album)

2. There's vomit on his sweater already/mom's spaghetti/he's nervous/but on the surface he looks calm and ready. (rap song from a movie)

3. "Please state your name for the record." (think dialogue from movie)

4. My shadow's the only one that walks beside me. (think guy-liner)

5. We all had our reasons to be there/we all had a thing or two to learn/ we all needed something to pray to. (think angry young woman)

6. It'll take more than a shot to get the poison outta me. (think hairband that's still making music)

7. Oh you hold me so close and my knees grow weak. (think 70's singer that had a penchant for looooong operatic songs)

8. Being good isn't always easy/no matter how hard I try. (think movie soundtrack)

9. Come and knock on our door/we've been waiting for you. (think 70's-era theme song)

10. It's a struggle livin' like a good boy oughta/in the summer watchin' all the girls pass by. (Think Elton John sound-alike)

Good luck, gang!

ETA: 2=Eminem "Lose Yourself" and 4=Green Day" Blvd. of Broken Dreams.
Congrats to Sean Murphy!

Go forth and waste your time on the internets ...

You can make yours here. Thanks to Brad B. for the link!

The "eight facts about yourself" meme

Rachel Barth tagged me, so I'm going to try to come up with eight interesting and/or unusual facts about myself. Here goes:

1. I used to read my dad's Archie comics as a kid. If I had to pick one of the guys, I'd have to go with Jughead. Apparently I was into geeks even then.

2. I've never had formal swimming lessons.

3. When I was in first grade, the family dog trapped a skunk underneath the house. The skunk sprayed and the smell permeated the whole place. We had to move out for a week while the smell dissipated.

4. That was not my last encounter with a skunk. A few years later, I went to our back door to let what I thought was my cat Frisky into the house. When I discovered it wasn't Frisky but a skunk, I yelled "Ahhh! A skunk!!!", slammed the door, and ran to get my parents. Unbelievably, that skunk didn't spray.

5. I played the drums in the sixth grade but quit because I was too scared to go to Contest.

6. I've been asked if I'm left-handed enough to think that maybe I'm a little ambidextrous.

7. My second toe is longer than my first. I've heard this is a sign of high intelligence. That almost makes up for not being able to wear sandals without someone commenting on my toes.

8. If asked to choose between cake and potato chips, I'll choose the cake.



I don't think I know eight people with blogs that haven't already been tagged ... but Sean Murphy, Innuendo, and Bridget, get eight facts about yourself up on your blogs pronto. I'll be checking ...

Was there really ever any question?

What Be Your Nerd Type? Your Result: Literature Nerd Does sitting by a nice cozy fire, with a cup of hot tea/chocolate, and a book you can read for hours even when your eyes grow red and dry and you look sort of scary sitting there with your insomniac appearance? Then you fit this category perfectly! You love the power of the written word and it's eloquence; and you may like to read/write poetry or novels. You contribute to the smart people of today's society, however you can probably be overly-critical of works. It's okay. I understand.
Drama Nerd
Science/Math Nerd
Gamer/Computer Nerd
Social Nerd
Artistic Nerd
Musician
Anime Nerd
What Be Your Nerd Type? Quizzes for MySpace

Word in Progress meme

Courtesy of Jodi Meadows.

Go to pages 123 of your current work in progess. If you aren't to page 123, go to page 23. If you're not to page 23, get busy and write until you are. Beginning with the fifth sentence from the top of the page, copy the entire paragraph.

From my YA book:

Clunks of metal downstairs made her pause. She didn’t know what it was, but it sounded heavy, and it was probably intended for her. Or Max. A man yelled—it sounded like the man that had visited her—and she began to work faster. She didn’t intend to be in this room when he came back more hurt and angry than he had been when he’d left.

This is from my first draft. I haven't read it in a while, and it's actually not so bad. Yeah, it needs some work ... but it's not terrible. I love when that happens.